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Friday, January 8, 2010

Consider Me Allured

I'm sorry...what?!?!

" '...and she went after her lovers,
but Me she forgot,' declares the Lord,
'Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.
...there she will sing as in the days of her youth."
Hosea 2:13b-14, 15b

These were the verses given to me in the wee hours of the morning yesterday as I sat in the dark seeking His voice.

I read them...I wrinkled up my brow as I copied them into my journal...and, as the children began to rise from their warm beds, I shook my head as I put my things aside to start my day...confused.

I mean...I have been getting up all week to meet with Him, as He called me to do.

I have been working on letting go of the weights that serve only to noose my neck.

I have been openly and honestly working with Him to stop running to the false gods of "Here-Let-Me-Numb-You-So-You-Don't-Have-To-Feel-That-Emotion" Church of Bina.

What in the world is He leading me to Hosea for?  And to those particular verses?  He even had me skip thru them a bit to pull out bits and pieces to form the phrase written above...  What is the deal???

So...on with my day I went...and out of my head the confusing and odd verses drifted.

Around 3:30 yesterday afternoon, I arrived home with our crew.  They set off to grab their snack and to start their mountains of homework...while I, the ever forgetful and rebellious one, headed off to worship the numbing power of cheese balls. 


Right...I know you are laughing right now...so go ahead.  Really...it is ok as I even have to laugh at that, but it was the truth.  I was willingly and knowingly diving into a massive bowl of crunchy cheese flavored goodness!  And why was this bad?  Well, my personal high places of false god worship usually happen in the bottom of a bag of Doritos that I just inhaled...or in a heaping helping of sweet Hershey's Kisses...or in the round puffed cheese balls. 

Don't get me wrong...I know full well that there is nothing wrong with the chips or orange puffs...unless you are specifically called away from the abuse of thier charms by your Maker.  And, well, let's just say that these are my favorite places to hide...and, yesterday, I poured that bowl to the rim all while the whispers echoed in my mind, attempting to call me back to Truth.

I chose to totally ignore Truth and pulled up the computer chair...ready to dive into FaceBook and my bowl of nummies with the air of a spoiled child who just ignored her father's directions.

And then...

My daughter spoke.  And her words, while seemingly simple, knocked the wind from my lungs and froze my handful of cheese goodness.  "I found a friend today, Momma!  She is in my choir class AND we have the same lunch AND we sat together today AND named pigeons together!"

You see...this is the daughter who hasn't had a friend in her lunch period all year.  She has developed depression-like symptoms over it, as this is Junior High, and has even doubted God over the fact that she prays for a chum faithfully without any answer. 

This is the daughter I have prayed for earnestly each day, begging for with tears in my eyes as I drove home from dropping her off...watching her sad face leave the car knowing it is just another friendless 8 hours in the vast land pre-teen scariness. 

This was an answer to a three month long prayer...and it came just as I was standing at the end of the high-dive board, ready to jump out of Truth's hands and into deadened seperation from His call.

I gushed over her sweet joy and laughed at the pigeon names with her...and then I reached for the book that I had last touched in confusion.  As my eyes worked their way thru the verses again, I saw it written there, plain as day: His written intent to allure me back to Him

He knew I would be romanced away...that I would hit that wall that says "...but this is too hard!!" and that He would need to get my attention in a way that would be greater than His whisper of "I love you".  So He said to me "...and I even love your daughter..."

...and with that, He won my heart. 

So...consider me allured.

Singing along with His melody while looking up as always...

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Give that girl a hug for me and tell her God does answer prayers. Love your stories! :O)

alicia said...

I Love that your sweet girl found a friend! (put the cheeseballs down- I get that!) It never ceases to amaze me how the scriptures no matter how seemingly meaningless and confusing at one point, can cause an equally amazing "ah-ha!" moment the next! God truly is amazing!
Blessings to you from the very, very super cold, sub-zero, frozen tundra!

Anonymous said...

I have tears in my eyes!!! God is the BEST at alluring His children! This absolutely a beautiful story! I am also glad your daughter found a friend in school. I know that can be very tough for a young lady!

I also want to mention that I am hosting a Christian Fiction Blog Carnival over at my place if you or any of your readers are interested! I would love to see your fiction writing in action!

-Alisa Hope

Anonymous said...

Did you just change your blog layout or did I miss it earlier!?! I love the header!!!

I commented this over at my place but I figured I would comment it here too.

"February 5th and I hope and pray you can join us Bina!!! Your writing ALWAYS moves me!!!"

I can't wait!!!

-Alisa Hope

Kristen Torres-Toro said...

So beautiful, Bina! Thank you for sharing that story!

You know, when I was a child I prayed for friends too. I even submitted that prayer request on a card in the offering plate for the prayer team. God did answer that prayer with some fo the most amazing friends I've ever known. He does hear--and care for--the prayers of a child--and us bigger kids too!

travelmom said...

Oh yes, this mother's heart knows well the tears that flow for our children. God is good to answer our tearful prayers and to consistently remind us that He desires that we long for Him. I am so happy to hear of answered prayer!

Deborah Ann said...

Aw, sweeeet! I had a similar tender moment with Him today...

Karen said...

Bina, God seems to know the way to a mom's heart is with her kids. I smiled while reading of her journey. God is good. Thanks for sharing that.

Kelly said...

That made me cry. Thank you for sharing.

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