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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

The Great Distortion

I don't know about you, but I am definitely one
who became a Christian with the assumption that
I was being placed on His Royal Advisory Board


I don't know about you, but I am definitely one
who hears God say "Ok, so you are gonna go that way..."
and I take off running at full steam,
without stopping to hear Him complete the instructions.


I don't know about you, but I am definitely one
who can often read "God n Me" 
a bit dyslexically, seeing instead
"Me n God".

See, though, I know I am not alone.  I am not ratting out any of your secrets...instead I have an entire Book filled with the mistakes of His chosen to pull from.  And while I never noticed this bit of information until I read it from Oswald Chamber's "My Utmost For His Highest" today...I was delighted to see that Moses was one like me

Moses knew early on that God had whispered into his heart the passion of "Go get Me My peeps outta Egypt, I am gonna free them..." (...Bina International Version...) and he reacted to it.  

Sadly, his reaction was one of extreme violence, actually killing someone and burying the body in the sand....a big whoopsie that he tried to hide from the One who set him afire with love for the Israelite people in the first place. 

What followed that was a time spent in the desert...hiding...tending sheep, not people...as he waited for God's passionate desire for relationship to ignite a burning, yet never consumed bush as a symbol of a defined calling. 

What I realize is that He was 100% right in his knowledge that God was calling him into service on His love's behalf...but he was 100% wrong in his delivery, racing forward to handle things on his own terms. 

What I wonder is:
Did the desire and urgency for those people ever waiver during that time away from them? 
Doubtful, if he is anything like me, which I can see that he is

Did the heavy guilt over his reaction's actions ever ease up during his desert stay? 
HIGHLY doubtful, knowing we have a bit in common.

As I read this morning, my eyes filled with tears and my heart beat with an awareness of my own reaction's actions...and the long, desert stay that has followed soon afterward as I was filled with the heaviness of having acted on my own. 

All the times that I have raced into the fray at His call,
only to find myself drowning for lack of knowledge of
how to swim those shark-infested waters.

All the times when I have used my "weapons"
to fight the right fight in the completely wrong manner,
then praying it would all just go away. 

All the moments when I have sat,
with my heart bleeding in my hand,
wondering why it is that I am passionate
about something that I just.
can't.
seem.
to.
do.

Yes...the truth is that God does use us to accomplish much in this world...

but the great distortion is that we
sometimes forget it is HE who does the work thru me,
not ME racing out to do it for Him.

When God fills me full of His passion, He does it with a reason.

When God calls me to a direction, He will be sure to equip me for the journey.

And when God decides to use me to reach out help people, He will provide the words.

My job, in the moments when I just can't seem to understand the why's and how come's of a God-prompted situation?  ...most simply worded:
"Be still and know...
I AM WHOIAM has sent you...
and He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it."


Looking up as always...

8 comments:

Diane said...

Awesome heart out there once again. Love the Bina Bible version too.... :O)

Sara said...

Beautiful post and even beautifuler (it SHOULD be a word:D) heart, Bina. And truly a well timed message for this season in my life. As always, I'm blessed to have stopped by.

alicia said...

My friend, I love this post. We can all find ourselves in those ancient people's ways if we take off our blinders. Talked about Gideon today and his CONSTANT "but are ya sure??" Easy to point a finger, but we ought to point in the mirror.
(quoted my own Ps 37 from the AIV translation... we get it.;))

Burciko said...

Lovely Blog..
Following you via blogfrog.. Hope you stop by too! ;)

Jennifer said...

Oh Bina, this is beautiful! You don't post this way much, but when you do, this is the raw beauty of the soul that I love so much.

Karen said...

Bina, we are all like that, I do believe. And boy am I glad the Father is in control and not me!

Deidra said...

We are forever linked to the people in the Bible and the more we learn about them, the more we learn about ourselves. Loved this...

~*Michelle*~ said...

Beautiful!

This is my favorite line:

"When God calls me to a direction, He will be sure to equip me for the journey"

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