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Monday, June 14, 2010

Revived Again

Oh Lord, I pray that You would hear me...and that once again, You would dare to answer my cry.  For here I sit, poor and needy...hungry for all You offer, yearning for a bite and yet willing to feast on the crumbs.

I turn to Your rescue from this utter churning in my soul. 

I don't do it because I think that I deserve Your defense.  I haven't illusions enough to forget that I've failed You more than I can admit to without breaking down.  No.  I am not one whose walk could be described as blameless...but the light in Your eyes remind me that I am one who can be called passionate...focused...and even, dare I say, devoted to this path You have laid before me. 

Oh, Creator! 

I fall down here before Your throne, and I plead for Your mercy.  I lay my fragmented life at Your feet, knowing that the glue still shows thick from my past, imperfectly hand-pieced back together...from where I have attempted to control and sustain on my own.  I know You know...that Your eyes can't help but trip over the childish handiwork that all my creativity can't begin to mask. 

Our eyes both take in this offering and my heart slams as the voices raise up within: unwelcome... unworthy... unfaithful... unwilling... fake... loser... sinner.  Circling, twirling and screaming, the past surrounds me in a cloud that threatens to block You out.  I lose my focus and my strength for a moment...until I hear Your lips part in a smile...until I sense the warmth in Your heart for this life that's broken and shattered. 

Now all that whispers is that I am ruined...but for You.

Father above, You are my God.
I am Your child!  
My pretense lays heaped at the gate behind as I come now, fully trusting in Your will.  I can't remember a moment in the last weeks when I haven't called out on Your favor and remembrance...I can't fathom a time when I would ever go back to where I've come from. 

I call out for Your peace and for Your joy because to You, O my sweet Lord...to You alone, I lift up my soul as You alone can hold it tender...fresh...revived again!


My soul's reflections and my heart's offerings, based in large part on Psalm 86:1-4. 

Listening to Kari Jobe's Revelation Song while looking up as always...

8 comments:

alicia said...

Beautiful, my sweet friend. Unworthy- so true, we all are. By his grace alone, we may come to Him who sits on the throne. His grace makes us worthy of His presence.
Too scary to think of going thru this life without Him. For we know whatever He leads us to, He will offer His way through.
Blessings, friend!

Melanie said...

Love it! I needed this today... so wonderful! Blessings to you this week!

Melanie
~ melscoffeebreak.blogspot.com ~

Melanie said...

BTW, did you redo your blog? It looks beautiful!

Melanie

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Beautiful post.
God hears those voices and waves them away. I love that verse that says that He lifts us to his cheek as a mother does a baby.

Crafty Gal Linda said...

Absolutely beautiful. It is exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks!

Diane said...

Glad you were able to get that out and know He hears you.

BTW-did you get the necklace, do you love it?

Barbie said...

This is simply beautiful. I can relate in many ways. Thank you for sharing this.

Kelly said...

What a beautiful place to be. :)

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