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Monday, November 2, 2009

The Day Of The Storm

It begins with a simple whine.

Her voice raises up an octave and the words travel out thru her nose to form this high pitched nasally sounding noise that is hers and hers alone.

To the people around me, she could sound as tho she is acting the baby...

...like she needs to get a grip

...like she should just act every bit of her eight years

But to me, the woman who carried her still strengthening frame within me all those eight years back, her tone tugs at the strings of my heart and I stop.

I bend down my ear, eager to absorb her whiney complaint with great joy.

She smiles at my attention, content with the world for the moment while I rest, as one who just solved world peace.

Just moment later, tho, civil unrest breaks out again as her brother mimics her "baby voice"...

...and then again as her sister breathes out "oh my gosh, emily..."

...and again as her throat hurts...

...and as her foot itches...

...and when her pencil breaks...

Over and over, I bend down my ear and offer the warmth my embrace.

Over and over, I whisper soft words of encouragement on this, the day that her world seems to be ending.

These verbal bandaids last for a fleeting moment before life's winds blow against her again...until she once again drags her hurting self back to where I am, pouring out her overwhelming heartbreak.

I could lose my patience with her...

...as her sisters and brother did over an hour ago

...as most people who don't know her like I do most likely would upon first sound of her high-pitched complaint

I could brush off her worries as silliness...

...as most of what slams against her tender heart are nothing more than simple annoyances

...things easily disguarded with an eye-roll by anyone else

I could but...

as the one who loves her heart and knows her as well as the back of my own hand...

as the one who is charged to protect and guide her...

as the one who knows what it is like to have a day when nothing seems to go right...

as the one who knows how often I have to show up again and again at His feet, longing for an eager ear and His open arms... 

...as her example of His holy love,
who am I to not offer this sweet babe of mine respite from her storm.



And as I hold her sweet smelling body to mine, I wonder:
Does He feel this way about me
about my constant issues
and my simple hurts?

How can I not allow her into my embrace
just as He always allows me into His...

"I call on You, O God,
for You will answer me;
give ear to me and hear my prayer.
Show the wonder of Your great love,
You who save by Your right hand
those who take refuge in You from their foes."
Psalm 17:6-7

So thankful for my Father's always open lap while looking up as always...

14 comments:

Diane said...

"as the one who is charged to protect and guard her" love it. :O)

steph said...

Such a sweet and loving mother you are. A mother's love, ah the comfort of it when you are needing it to take away the hurt.

much HUGS!

Alicia said...

Oh, I totally know where you're coming from.

Precious picture!

Eileen Astels Watson said...

Patience is your middle name me thinks. Beautiful, you're a great mom, Bina!

alicia said...

you're such an awesome mom! Can't imagine how sick of my whining God must get, but yet, He chooses to comfort me too. Excellent analogy!

Kelly said...

She's so lucky to have you, and we're so lucky to have Him. :)

Sara said...

tears actually rolling down my cheeks today, bina, beacuse this could have been the story of my age 8 son and me....God has always given me HIS heart for him...when others have looked and judged i have taken him and told him how special he is......because that's how God loves me over and over....you have any amazing gift..

~*Michelle*~ said...

OH Bina.......this choked me up.

This is so convicting! God def. needed me to read this today. We are going through a season of whinyness with my little girl who is seven...but shamefully I have not been as compassionate as I should after a long day of hearing it. Thank you so much for reminding me that her storms and trials are valid and that I need to assure her that I will always be her shelter.

I think this was the line that was most convicting:

How can I not allow her into my embrace
just as He always allows me into His...


I think this is my favorite post by you so far......

L.L. Barkat said...

Bina, I'm just stopping in to say thank you for being part of the SC giveaway. It was nice to have you there, first thing! :)

Christina Davis said...

Beautiful.

I understand what you've written and I know that because I have God's unending love and patience in my life, I am free to let Him work through me to comfort my kids even when it's hard.

Well said.

Karen said...

That picture is a treasure, totally reinforcing your post. This is a moving post. Thanks, Bina.

Jennifer said...

How beautiful, Bina--and I love the pic. I have so few of me with the kids because I'm the household photographer. Your day sounds a lot like mine. The only thing greater than a mother's love is the love of our heavenly Father. Never apologize to anyone for the unconditional love of Christ that you show your children.

Jennifer said...

What is it about moms? I'm 32 years old and there are still days that I would love nothing more than to crawl up in my mom's lap and have her make it all better. And I'm not gonna lie...I was still doing just that only a few years ago. Moms can make it all better, if even just by listening.
Love the image of crawling up on the Lord's lap and being comforted there. :)

~ Kelly Ann ♥ said...

I love that song on your page! Who sings it- ?

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