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Thursday, October 15, 2009

When Words Fail

It happens sometimes.

I say what I mean...
what I thought was good for the moment...
what I thought would help.

My opinion was sought out...my thoughts requested...

So I open my mouth and out it flows: pearls of wisdom
...or so I thought.

I am sincere and my heart is laid out in my voice..but then it happens.

The narrowing of the eyes as the lights go out on their heart.

I realize that my words of "help" were the key to their undoing...the unlocking of dire pain.

I didn't mean it...Lord knows, I would never intentionally hurt anyone like that.

I see it happen...but I do nothing to right the wrong...and in fact I help the train wreck along.

What was once a moment of sharing is now a desperate competition for whose voice gets heard...

A time of pure, beautiful humility is now a grave for broken words and the dying hope for peace.

It cuts deeply...to know that when you meant to help you injured instead...

...to know that you may have overstepped the path...

...and to know that once off the right road, you will stand and fight for the pride of your own view...


I took my heart to God two nights back as my tears bathed His sweet feet.

I prodded and questioned until my soul ran out of words...until all I could do is sob in His presence.

In the silence, His Spirit spoke to mine... "John 17:4"

I have brought You glory on earth by finishing the work You gave me to do.

But have I??

I am called to be a light...to be the salt...to be the reflection of His loving mercy.

I am called to be the patient influence of love's existence... "James 1:19-20"

Everyone should be quick to listen,
slow to speak and slow to become angry,
because our anger does not produce the righteousness the God desires.

I am called to remember that He is the I Am that I am barely capable of understanding...

...and to remember that sometimes, when the lights go off in another's heart...

...it is best to stop talking, stop standing, stop fighting, to stop doing at all...

...and just be there for them...

...in silence...

...in love...

...in realizing that the work I am called to is to live simply out the patient hope that He can and will speak enough for us both when the words fail us.


Listening to silence while looking up as always...

12 comments:

More Than Words said...

Just keep meditating on Gods grace, my friend.

He knows our hearts and the intentions of it. Better than we do.

HUGS!!

Diane said...

So beautiful. Your heart is opened up right before God and He is so tender with it. :O)

Kristen Torres-Toro said...

Hi, Bina!

Thanks for coming by my blog! I look forward to getting to know you!

This is beautiful! Have a great day!

Deborah Ann said...

I feel like you have just looked inside my soul. I say the wrong things way too often. I love how you're feeling led to just be quiet, I'm right there with you. Thank you for being so vulnerable, you have helped me more than you could possibly imagine...

Debby

Bina said...

Alicia...God's grace is an amazing thing! A beautiful gift given when I deserve so much less...an encouragement to get up and try again. It reminds me "Bring Me glory on earth as you complete the job I have given you...keep completing even IF you mess up along the way!" Hugs back :)

Diane...it is funny that it is only when we share the heartbreak that it becomes beautiful, huh? Thanks for your words of comfort - they are appreciated!

Kristen...and thank YOU for stopping over here! :) Hope your day is blessed.

Deborah...aw, I am glad that God can use our hurts to guide and touch others along the way. That goes back to His mercy and the beauty He makes from our brokenness! :) Thanks for stopping by today and know that I have prayed for you just now.

Things are better - it was a moment and we're in a new one...I love how He works! :)
Much love,
Bina

Julie Gillies said...

Hi Bina,

This is my first visit to your beautiful blog. What an honest, beautiful post.

Lord, help me to remember I am called to be a reflection of Your loving mercy!

Bina said...

Julie...welcome and thank you so much for your comment! God's call to my heart was vulnerability...and I find that the more open I am, the more He fills me...and leads me to more of His own! :)
Hugs to you today,
Bina

Tamika: said...

You are radiating God's love! That was lovely.

I am so glad that the Word of God is available for our comfort and correction.

Blessings Bina!

Jennifer @ JenniferDukesLee.com said...

Oh, ... wow.

You asked me over at my place: "Is it too forward to say that my heart loves yours?"

Not too forward at all. I feel the same way, Bina! And this ... this is another picture into your beautiful, vulnerable, Christ-following heart.

Sending love your way ...

Bina said...

Tamika...Thank you for your kind words...and AMEN AMEN AMEN!! I love that He loves me too much to leave me where I am!!

Jennifer...I wrote this blog RIGHT after reading yours. God used your words to tap into the part of me that was hidden and still a little raw...and in sharing, the wound stopped festering. Keep doing what you do, my friend, as He uses it...and I am sure that I am not the only to feel His impact. :)

Much love to you both today...
Bina

alicia said...

A valuable lesson... It is so much harder to be slow to speak than it is just to "share our wisdom" when it is covered with good intentions! I am sure we have all been here before and will be again. For whatever reason, I have that Allison Krauss song in my head now "You say it best, when you say nothing at all" Story of my life my friend.
Much love to you today!

Bina said...

My Alicia...I was thinking of the same song! That is funny... It was a hard lesson to learn...still is as I have so MUCH to say...is hard to remember that sometimes I just need to swallow my words (and the pride that says how wise they are) and listen...
Hugs to you...
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