I'm tired.
Not the "I wish I was still in bed sleeping" kind of tired, although the thought of being able to hide under the warmth of my covers sounds ever so appealing today.
No, it is more of the "Can't You just make it all stop for just a minute" kind of fatigue that is eating at me. The sad thing is that I can't even tell you what "it" is...I can only generalize it as "emotions".
I don't know if I am alone in my desire to run from the tsunami that is emotion to me...they pop up and I feel the definate need to flee in abject terror.
unworthiness hide
Anger RUN
Fear run faster
Sadness can't we get a car to escape?
PAIN forget it, I'm too slow. just gonna lay down and die now...
I hate this about myself...that I can't just look my giants in the eye with the Truth of Life burning out from mine ...that I can't just be at peace with knowing that who I am is ok ...that who I am not is also ok ...that I am the person that I AM made me to be...
I have heard that it takes fifty good things to be said in order to erase one bad thing... Small steps...let's see what comes to mind today when I remember what God has called me:
complete holy righteous faithful Mine remembered held uplifted
restored set free
blessed beautiful perfected renamed set apart redeemed
protected glorious
precious full alive chosen rich loved treasured special thought of
hand-crafted
adored filled strengthened watched over sought out
pursued desired wanted
needed special gem shining bright emptied savored
cared for forgiven
known searched favored spoken for trusted His
All we can do is kill off the bad, one stab at a time.
But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God's own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him
who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light
1 Peter 2:9
God called us His....I guess the daily question to remember is:
Who's voice is winning in your mind today?
Listening to His Truth once again while looking up as always...
10 comments:
I'm praying for rest for you, Bina! Real rest--and peace. May you feel His arms around you! Have a great weekend!
Love you girl! You are so good at saying what's in my and so many other hearts. Make sure you pray about any physical things that are adding to emotional/spiritual strains. Sometimes, lacking vitamins, or crazed hormone changes can be another culprit. :O)
Kristen ~ Your prayers are oh so welcomed and most surely needed. Your kindness makes my heart smile...and I thank you.
Diane ~ It is a funny thing, this blog. I actually detest vulnerability with a deep passion...and yet God loves it so. I am glad that He can use it for others...and I am thankful for your devoted kindness to my heart.
As for physical strains, asthma is alive as the season changes around here...and am sure I am lacking in the vitamin department. Didn't think so much of that as I wrote, but I am now...thank you!
Hugs to you both today...really.
:) Bina
May peace seep into your being and you be lifted up in joyousness, Bina! I'm praying for you, Bina!
Praying for the sunshine to penetrate to your soul today. For renewed strength and energy, and for taking joy in knowing that you are LOVED by so many!
Blessings to you this Friday!!
Bina, I love how you share with such transparency. Your last line, "who's voice is winning in your mind today" needs to be put on a banner, bumper sticker or something! Great words!
Hope this weekend brings you peace, joy and fellowship.
Blessings8
I love your honesty here and how you expressed it! This is an amazing post and I am blessed having read it! I am sending a prayer and hug your way!
Thank you once again for putting in to words what is on my heart. I am sorry you are feeling the weight of this world on you. I know it can feel like it's crushing you. I pray that you will feel the lightness of hope and the freedom of our Father being in control of it all. :)
two more words...
beautiful
loved
This is the first time I have seen your post. I came to it from Blessedalatte. Thank you for listing the things we are in Christ. He has done so much for us. It really is all about Him and not about us. To Him be the glory and honor forever. Amen
Deb W.
Post a Comment