Friday, October 9, 2009
Intersection...Mary's Heart with Mine
When I was asked to portray Mary in a five-minute monologue, I thought no big deal, right? She is so well known, it can't be that hard. But then her story kept me up at night, frustrated me, pushed me to my knees at His feet...where I heard His simple whisper: "Find where you connect to her". Me? Connect to the 13 year old virgin mother of the Savior for my soul??? Ya...right...not so simple as I first thought.
But then, one blessed Sunday afternoon, He reached in and used my mother's heart to make me really see her...and then He used my hands to spill it out as one word echoed thru my mind...and I post the finished result here to share with those of you who will not be up on that mountain with us tomorrow morning.
As this posts, I am up a beautiful mountain, praising God with wonderful ladies...but I pray that as you read this, you are touched by her story, as told by my heart...
So, being true to myself, five minutes after the angel had departed I knew what it was my life was going to be:
I knew that I was going to be God’s vessel for the salvation of His people.
I knew that the world would rejoice in His coming.
I knew that my family would be just as excited as I was.
I still remember racing home, my heart full and my smile bright.
My life had changed, but the new one laid out before me was full of promise and I was confident in where it was going.
It’s a funny thing…saying yes to God. We can say yes, fully sincere in our response but only because we hear what we want to hear…we take His directions on how to cross the street and use that to create a world map.
I never once thought that in saying yes to God I would be path full of heartbreak, hardship and uncertainty.
It never crossed my mind that my parents wouldn’t be excited with my part in this plan.
I never could have prepared my heart for the wail that escaped my mother’s lips while my father tore his clothing.
I never would have thought I would have to answer questions on my propriety in front of my father and the elders in our community.
I would have never expected to hear my life long friends whisper and giggle as I walked past them…
Nor would I have ever thought that I would be labeled a “whore”.
I never once envisioned this life when I stood before the radiating glory of God’s angel…I had no idea that this is what I was signing up for.
Then came the journey while massively pregnant, which I don't want to talk about.
Then came giving birth on the ground next to wild animals, which I really don't want to talk about.
And then…the moment came. The one that I just knew would never come.
You see, I had been faithful during my pregnancy to remember that this child growing within me was not mine. While he was using my body to gain strength to enter this world, he was not of this world and therefore belonged solely to God.
at 6:00 PM