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Monday, February 8, 2010

My American Idol

Yes, I admit it.


I love American Idol.


Ok...yes, I will admit to that too.


I am one of the ones clogging up the phone lines as I actually vote for contestants
...many, many times.

Now that that is out there, I hope we can still be friends.  :)

This morning, God laid on my heart to read from Exodus.  As my eyes moved thru the well known List O'Commands, He stopped my eyes on a particular instruction in the I Know Them So Well That My Eyes Glaze Over Top Ten.

"You must not make for yourself an idol that looks like anything in the sky above or on the earth below or in the water below the land.  You must not worship or serve any idol, because I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God."

I know this commandment. 

Most anyone who knows about God knows this commandment. 

But God glued my eyes to this small set of sentences as He brought a picture of a heavily used "idol" in my own home: 

Me

Yup.  I am my own American Idol.

Now before y'all click the "x" and run in terror of the girl who thinks waaa-aaay too much of herself, let me explain. 

I am a people pleaser by nature.  It drives me nuts to think that someone out there may think badly of me for any reason.  I'm constantly trying to think "what'll they think of me if I do that" and I will often change my course of action as now dictated by my over-inflated desire to do it "right".  

...please, please tell me that I am not alone in this But Everyone's Looking At Me mentality....

As I sat, it dawned on me what I had done.  I had allowed the thoughts of myself to take on a life of their own!!  I have worshipped the perception of me, based on what I think others want to see and on what I think they think about what they see.  Whew - no wonder I am always so tired!!

Right after my quiet time, I logged into Blogspot to see a post by a great author pal of mine, Nicole Baart. (...excuse me while I bend over to pick up the name I just dropped...)  She was talking about Tim Tebow's SuperBowl commercial...and she linked over to an article written by an out-spoken Pro-Choicer who had nothing but praise for the way that this young man has handled himself and his beliefs up to this point.

And while I don't feel that this Christian young man should be worshipped either because he is, after all, simply a man...I do see an example of what God calls us to in how he handles himself.  He honors His Lord, he honors the body that God has blessed him with and He works to "live in order to please God" as we are all called to in the book of Thessalonians.


So I chastised a child in an elevated tone of voice. 
Gasp.

The house is a bit un-tidy simply because, dude, I have FIVE kids.
Gulp.

And yes!!, this is what I look like with no makeup on cuz durnitall, I am tired.
Screech!

I need to remember that God is my boss...and if He isn't urging me to change something, let it be!!!

Ya. 

"Let It Be" and "One Day At A Time, Sweet Jesus" are Battle Of The Band-ing it in my mind too...

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Looking up as always...

6 comments:

Diane said...

Great post! Why do we all do that..... care what others think? Crazy!!!! God's opinion of me is the ONLY opinion that matters. Period. Thanks for once again opening up your heart with a can opener and laying it all out there for us to buffet on. Hugs :O)

alicia said...

Love it! You hit the nail on the head as usual. I still remember the first time I was actually "convicted" of this sentiment- believe it or not Dr Phil said it. Yup. To the woman he said "You are really vain if you think that much of yourself that people are really thinking that much about you." At first it sounds harsh, but its true.

And better yet, it is only GOD's thoughts of us that matter!
Many hugs!!
(drive the short drive to the desert, you know you want to!You, me, Sedona, God's spendor everywhere?! Come on! How can you say no now?) :)

Karen said...

Idols, Satan's most bedazzling trick and I fall for it too. God is wonderful to know all, see all and still sacrifice for us. PTL

Kristen Torres-Toro said...

I've never known a voter before. :0) I've tried a few times, but never got through. :0)

Love your layout! Thanks for this reminder, Bina! Have a great day!

Michelle DeRusha said...

I really love and respect your honesty here, Bina. And don't fear, others of us are in the same boat. I like your line, "I have worshipped the perception of me..."

Yes, I have too. And thanks for pointing it out so eloquently!

Deborah Ann said...

Been there done that. In fact, if someone stops visiting my blog (hint hint) I get hurt feelings, and start to think badly of myself.

But you know something? I have found great relief in laying down all the thoughts that others might think of me, and I only carry what God says about me. Now my load is as light as a feather, because God seems to like me!

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