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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The City of Healing

I have always loved writing poetry, as there really are no boundaries to how you lay it out.  I started out writing this blog entry in my normal paragraph form, but realized it was too lengthy...too much detail, too much extra info...and it evolved into what you are about to read. 

When I come here with  heavy things to express, things that are most dear to my heart, I find that my mind plays best on a boundry-less playground as I am enabled to really lay it all out, much as David in the Psalms.

Hope you don't mind...and if you do...well....hmmm....

The City of Healing
My heart is on a journey...
...one that isn't mapped or known by me. 
I am learning how to let go...
...how to be content, enjoying a view that I don't control.


The pain flew into my life not long ago...
...the arrow shot from the camp of those I trusted.
It only hurts when I remember...
...which is more often than I am comfortable with.


I placed this injury on the altar, pleading for healing...
...both for my own heart and for the relationship seemingly severed. 
Three months ago, I laid my heart out and wept on His feet...
...and for almost three months, my answer has been silence.
And although the pain stirred me often...
...I found myself somehow ok with the nothingness
as I rested in His sweet embrace.


Three days ago, He stood me up from His lap and sent me out...
...I find myself shaking
...trembling...
...fearful...
He tells me that my destination is called Healing...
...and the journey is called Forgiveness
...full of unknowns...
...outside of my control...


Oh my God, hear my cry!
Please, listen to my prayer!
From the depths of my soul,
I cry to You for help as my heart burns, heavy within me.
Guide me now,
to the high rock of safety...
to You, as You are my safe refuge...
...Your hand is the place where enemies can't hurt me
and I pray now to live forever
in the safe warmth of your wings.


I hear You, Lord...
...and even tho my knees shake,
I am coming.

*Last section, from "O my God, hear"to"warmth of Your wings", is a personalization of Ps 61:1-4*

Listening to Sara Grove's Fireflies And Songs while looking up as always...

9 comments:

Sara said...

hey bina, beautiful post..i've been through a time very much like the one you describe, so trying...and yet, it forever built my TRUST in my daddy GOD, and taught me to trust that even when there seems to me to be no answer....that before the foundations of the earth He has heard and answered......and that in His sovereignly appointed time, He will reveal it to me....

alicia said...

What a beautiful description of something so ugly to walk through! Prayers and much love go out to you today!

Julie Gillies said...

Exquisitely beautiful, Bina. Such a vivid, touching description of the journey each one of us must walk. Thankfully, we never walk alone.

Jennifer @ Getting Down With Jesus said...

Oh my ...

The Beautiful Psalm of Bina.

You truly shine, sister.

Jennifer said...

Beautiful Bina. We all celebrate Jesus' work in our lives in different ways--poetry or paragraphs. :-) Our hearts may speak in different ways, but it's still the same language of His love.

strokeofliving said...

In the first photo there is an image of what seems to be a face, I don't know if that was intentional or not but it's interesting that that photo is under the statement "...a view that I don't control."

I don't write poetry but you do. And thank God. It's lovely :-)

Libbie said...

That was beautiful! What a way to peek into your heart. I am so blessed by visiting you today. I read it twice :) And I will be back to read it again :)

Christina Davis said...

You've got to know how special you are because you were allowed such pain. Because God knows more about you than you do.

I know pain too. I'm sure different circumstances from yours but I know pain. But I also know that I would rather live a complicated, seeking life than to coast through it, unscathed and unused.

Beautifully written.

mom2six said...

These lines make my heart ache and yet fill me with such joy.

He tells me that my destination is called Healing...
...and the journey is called Forgiveness
...full of unknowns...
...outside of my control..

Thanks for sharing your pain - it has encouraged me.

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